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THE END
Written by Administrator, on 10-12-2008 14:55  
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HAR! Just read 'The End' on my recording of No, You can't Have It. It was my very first book in that I actually started it first. I finished Dunkin the Vampire Slayer One before NYCHI, but truthfully, NYCHI is my first 'attempt' at a novel. It is a science fiction book, in the vein of Jumper by Stephen Gould. I had not learned the value of using conjunctions when constructing realistic dialog when I wrote this, but I changed it as I recorded. SO this does not read like the book. (Gee! I must have 100 typos in the original! Shameful...) BUT IT'S DONE! And ya know what? I think it sounds pretty good. I had a lot of fun reading it. Now for the hard part—editing. I'll be working on editing and I am trying to think of some way to get it to GCC club members early for initial feedback. Anyway, I thought I would share this happy announcement with my fans!

Last update: 10-13-2008 05:42

Published in : News, Latest
 
IT'S COMING...
Written by Administrator, on 10-01-2008 15:17
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Soooon....Har!

 

OK, this is one share of Crusade Movie Stock. I'm giving it FREE to everyone who has bought anything from me. That share is worth six-bucks towards the movie IF it gets made—and I get paid. I'm getting a lot of interest in Crusade; in so far as it's seemingly an ideal structure for a film. We'll see. So, any purchase you make, gets the share. And I'm building the Filemaker Pro database with everyone in there, and I'll post it (with a fake name of course—can't have yer neighbors finding out you like this seditious nonsense). Then I'm going to send each buyer a link to get their share—suitable for framing or wiping a runny nose.

 

BIG QUESTION FOR FANS! I have fifty-plus pages of No, You Can't Have It recorded. The question: should the Devlin voice (the obnoxious voice) be used for other characters? Does that annoy you fans? Should I only use the rough, natural delivery for Devlin?

 

ALSO: many of you email (I answer all emails, and all posts to me work) asking what I am working on. Here is the list of current projects and their status:

 

The Boy With the Pale Skin - Complete, edited, waiting for my final read through.

 

Devlin II, Abnormal Investigations, Case File: Cleft Behind: Complete- Ready.

 

Dunkin III, It Ain't Over Til the Fat Man Stings - 86 pages, 27,000 words.

 

I Am Not Your Enemy - Sci-Fi - Force Field - 20,000 words

 

Devlin III, Plan Fore From Outer Space - 8,000 words

 

Top Secret Adventure/Humor Novel - 12,000 words

 

That's where we are today, folks. I write 3,000 words every day. I throw some away, but I keep pecking the keyboard. Two fingers, fast as a mutant. Har! And for those who say 'You'd get more done if you worked on one at a time'. I answer, 'Yeah, but would it be readable? Whenever I do something the right way, it sucks'.

 

Hey! I am at 94 paid downloads of Dunkin II. And Dunkin II is Number One on podiobooks.com's quality rankings...you know, those little stars you pick. It only has six votes, but it's a perfect five stars. Let's keep it that way! I mean, I spent fifty bucks on a microphone to do this stuff. Now I know, it takes your valuable time to go over, sign in, click subscribe, click iTunes, cancel, then click 'leave a rating' for the book. It's like five minutes. But, it helps. It keeps me up there. It gets me more exposure. It gets me more listeners. It gets me more liquor. More liquor gets me writing. More writing gets you more entertainment. YA SEE! That's how to run a campaign. Explain things. Not jingoisms, sound bites— hard facts! I should run fer public office. Anyway, if ya love the Hack's work, go click the stars. ya ain't even got to write anything. Hell, just copy and paste this: Greg Crites is the finest writer on earth. He's original. I wnat to bear his children. (If yer a guy, just add: if I were a fine redhead example of the feminine persuasion...I really like redheads. Har!)

 

And let me take this opportunity to thank each and every one of you defective mendicants (which is the one word guaranteed to piss off Groo, Sergio Aragones' comic character...who always makes me laugh) for your support, your kind words, your willingness to share a laugh with 'The Hack'.

Over and out!

Last update: 10-05-2008 10:34

Published in : News, Latest
 
SUPERCRAPTACULAR GCC CLUB
Written by Administrator, on 09-29-2008 00:00
Average user rating    (2 votes)
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THAT'S IT!!! No more deadtree books. We're only going to sell ebooks and audio versions of The Hack's work. Books are a pain in the ass. They cost too much, they use too much raw material to produce, and I'm tired of fooling with them. (I'll sell one if I absolutely have to)

You want entertainment? You enjoy The Hack's work? Then here's the deal. Get the regular three-dollar download of individual titles emailed to you in .pdf format (just use the donate button on the left and signify which title you want.), or use the autodownloadthingamabob I worked for months on, or get the supercraptacular GCC club DVD with eight full-length novels and three full length audiobooks as read by The Hack himself.

AND THE DISK IS SIGNED!

I don't submit to outside companies. So, I control access to my work and thus am destined to remain unknown except for a few thousand of you intelligent, attractive, and discerning fans. (Crimany! I should sell used cars.)

Anyway, for 24.95 you get the dvd that's loaded with my work. Just look at the hours of entertainment! Gas burns at 12-bucks an hour—by enjoying these stories, you should save nearly four-hundred bucks in fuel costs alone! All for less than the price of a single hardcover from a real writer...ahem...ackk.

There will only be 1000 of this product made. Buy it today and I'll include a free download of the next GCC book that is ready for distribution. (Your choice of: Devlin II, The Boy With the Pale Skin, or Dunkin III—these three are all nearly ready for release.

Last update: 09-29-2008 18:50

Published in : News, Latest
Keywords : greg crites, novel, humor writer
 
Dunkin III
Written by Administrator, on 07-07-2004 03:54
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This is a current project author, Greg Crites, is fine tuning. The third and final installment in the Dunkin the Vampire Slayer trilogy. We've included the entire first chapter for those who have followed the series.

Last update: 05-02-2008 07:07

Published in : Free Stuff, General
 
Devlin II Teaser
Written by Administrator, on 07-07-2004 06:00
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Another Devlin Novel currently being written by The Hack. For those fans of Devlin we have included chapter one of this newest bit of nonsense. Estimated completion date: May 31, 2008 (If we can keep him sober and upright long enough to finish)

Last update: 05-02-2008 07:09

Published in : Free Stuff, General
 

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